Saturday, July 3, 2010

Did I Tell You About . . . ?

Even Leroy Lockhorn, the most interesting man in the world, needs to update his repertoire once in a while. Loretta gladly reminds him of this as they're off to yet another Levittown cocktail party. He may have to rely tonight on his old tried-and-true standard, and that is speaking out against the institution of matrimony. As an afterthought, you would think Leroy has thousands of hospital stories, given his medical history.

Friday, July 2, 2010

Ashes To Ashes

Loretta has served Leroy his dinner. It is an abomination, as is anything Loretta has ever cooked. This time we have a steak, burnt beyond recognition, of the consistency of shoe leather, and emitting acrid fumes throughout the dining room. This wouldn't be the first time Leroy has recited a requiem in memory of whatever the culinary atrocity on his plate used to be.

Thursday, July 1, 2010

In Absentia

Leroy wasn't around today, so Loretta couldn't insult him in front of an audience (comprising the sole bored looking neighbor) as usual. She resorts to insulting him when he's not even there, but it's not the same. Who prints pictures made from cell phones, anyway?