Sunday, May 23, 2010

Impressionists Are Impressionable

Today's Sunday Lockhorns is outstanding. We have Leroy in the hospital, an appointment with D. Pullman, Leroy in an art gallery, Loretta's dieting fiascos, and Leroy's bimbo-ogling, all in one glorious set of panels. These are five acute specimens from the pantheon of beloved Lockhorns gags, and we should take the time to be appreciative.

Leroy, the patron saint of inept handymen, is in the hospital again. His broken right foot, in traction, is counterbalanced by a pulley operated by his injured right hand; this may be intended as a strengthening exercise. It appears he's sustained a concussion as well, and further bandages and body scars suggest that Leroy took a terrible fall and he's lucky to have survived. Loretta long ago was inured to such spectacles, over thousands of such hospital visits throughout her marriage. By now, her visitation routine consists of a deadpan delivery of a caustic one-liner by which to ridicule Leroy and his predicament.

D. Pullman, Marriage Counselor, has his hands full with Loretta, who once again insists on monopolizing the session. Between this, and the $175 per hour he shells out for these sessions, Leroy has plenty to fume about.

Loretta fancies herself cultured and refined, and often drags Leroy against his will to artistic venues, such as today's art gallery, where Leroy takes a poke at Loretta's pretentiousness by hilariously mixing a cliche with an art genre.

Leroy tells it like it is as he exits the Golden Dolphin with poor Loretta, forever caught in the morass of poor body image as she perpetually frets about, and cheats on, her myriad of self-imposed diets.

At a social gathering, Leroy partakes in his usual habit, gawking wistfully at a towering, and incredibly well-endowed, bimbo. In response, Loretta makes a puzzling remark to her bored neighbor. Not entertaining thoughts would seem to imply an inability to think, but then how can Leroy be entertained by thoughts when he cannot think in the first place?

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