Where Have You Gone, Orson Welles?

Lockhorns Sunday commences.

Loretta in Panel One combines two of her greatest skills, sucking Leroy dry of his funds, and providing wry one-liners.

Leroy in Panel Two displays his greatest talent, insulting Loretta's cooking. This time, for the benefit of yet another hapless dinner guest, Leroy attains new heights by comparing the dining experience to the violent pain one could suffer while engaged in sadomasochistic sexual play.

Although Andy Warhol references have become cliched, Leroy nonetheless pulls one off brilliantly in Center Panel as Loretta bellows like a moose into the living room. Leroy's neighbor is enjoying his visit thoroughly.

In Panel Four, compulsive shopper Loretta finally has bought something practical, a TV remote with which she can engage Leroy in vicious duels nightly. Far from worried, Leroy is coolly poised for the challenge.

Loretta, appalled at Leroy's complete ineptitude at interior decorating, has decided to take matters directly to the government, demanding Leroy's constitutional right to be protected from himself. The clerk has decided that this is the day to request a transfer.